Loneliness gives me a certain type of calm and peace. I can spend an entire day in bed, sleep, listen to whatever moves me. Rethink my thoughts and see if it could be real. I am contented in this state, unbothered.
In the midst of your peace doing nothing, there will be people bugging you to get up. Have a life. The thought cramps your brain. You foresee how exhausting it will be but still you say yes; for the love of them.
You drag your gray colored soul to the blinding sun, trying to do the things people says to be fun.
When you are already laughing hard and a bit sore, you feel this warmth inside your heart. These are the souls that made me want to live, pursue and do the things I do. By myself I am probably near darkness, succumb of all the things I can rant about.
They are not exhilaratingly gorgeous, beautiful, talented or perfect. Most are tainted souls too. They accept you: flaw by flaw, being mean is legal but they tell it to your face when you’re stepping out the line. You can speak your mind for you knew they will not judge you for what you said, but understand where it is all coming from.
You sometimes think you want to disappear, but all you really want is to be found.